just because i am fat

hello everyone! first of all if you are reading this dakshita then hit a like and comment to show your presence! and everybody say hello to my friend. in case you aren't able to look directly at her or you haven't met her then let me tell you how she looks. she's thin,short and cheerful. quite my type . dirty minded and naughty. she has vampire like two canines and hair so wavy that i could kill for!

And the season’s back when girls finally feel insecure and the most disgusting thing ever on the planet but now I don’t feel sympathetic towards them I need sympathy for my own dear life. I always bluffed about how beautiful a girl is when she’s comfortable in her own self. With her own body and there’s nothing she’d want to hide. Even if she’s curvy, fat or thin she’s satisfied but let me clear it up now. It’s all a trap. Life feels horrible after my realisation of being fat. I am just of no good. No, I haven’t been struck by lightning I am struck with cholesterol! Oh my! It would have been better if I would have been struck by lightning than to face this ugly truth about myself that makes me want to puke all over the place. I never had that coming. Actually I am damn confused about how to explain it. I am at a stage of my life which I thought I’d never end up to. At least not in my teens but I guess the odds aren’t on my favour. Hit me in the face someone?

So, it all started with a very happy story when I and my dearest friends were over to a friend’s house for a sleepover after her tiring dance party. Honestly I’ve always loved dance parties no matter how much my heels ache the very next day there’s something about them that I can’t resist. It isn’t only just the dance party but it’s also about what we are going to wear. basically this is what we talk about weeks ago before we even know the party is coming but since we are girls and girls like fashion and fashion is fun we gossip all day long about how glam and tip toed we’ll be looking on the big day. we all are the suspense breakers as we can’t simply keep our outfit a secret so all you can do with us is that talk about your outfit as much as possible and explain each and every millimetre of it and yes, don’t forget your accessories! I love this topic so much that I can talk about it day and night. As per my record which completely says that I looked glam in all the recent parties I am pretty much sure that I’ll look better in my future outfits too! Honestly I love it when my besties complement me and my collection, the feeling that one gets at that time is unexplainable. So, every time I go out for a much awaited shopping spree before picking out just the right outfit I always keep in mind that it looks exactly the way I want it to look in any party. Not too decent nor too out of the world. I carefully choose my outfit and no wonder how many I have but I always fall for the one in the black. Be it totally black or just a little hint of it. Something is there about it that catches my eye. Well so, this time I decided to wear the dress my sister bought for me from my dream destination Paris! Yes, at first i was freaking out too but I just wanted all eyes on me so I decided to pair that LBD with some black stockings and a pair of black wedges and a prepped up ponytail. I thought I looked too damn hot for it but as I had seen the birthday girl’s dress I wanted to be another showstopper in the room. To my expectation at first everyone was looking at me and admiring me but then if we move this story a bit ahead when I was at my friend’s home one of my tall bestie commented that I looked healthy. You obviously know my reaction very well don’t you? I was like oh my god! What? Do I look fat? Omg! No! No! Noooooooooooooooooo! For god’s sake no! I asked her if she was serious and she nodded which seemed pretty much like a yes to me. Well never mind that I ignored it and cooled myself down but then today during school hours another best friend came up and told me that her mother even said to her that I looked healthier than before. Again you very well know my reaction. Kill me please!!!!????? Why? Why only me? She even pointed out to my diet and told me to control a bit on my carvings and stay away from my beloved chocolates and all sorts of unhealthy things. How can I stay away from them? Can you stay away from your loved ones? Just as I was about to ignore it I sensed a sudden urge to cry and whined like a two year old in front of her with a very tensed face. To give me relief she confirmed that it wasn’t much and that she too looked just like me but like I cared at that time about that. I know they all were just lies. Sad lies. I whined all my way in the recess and asked one of my boy friends to tell me whether I seemed fat from anywhere and he at first took it in a very casual way and replied with a very satisfying no but then he snapped back and instantly replied that my face looked a bit smaller than my body! Oh no! I don’t know what to do! So as soon I rushed home I asked my father to tell me a few exercises which help reduce fat. I feel dumb now rivewing myself in the mirror now since like from the time I have reached home. I feel disgusting not just because I was told I looked fatter but also because I never believed in any of this. Where am the me which said once that beauty comes in all shapes and sizes? Where is that me? At this time I am questioning myself if I actually think that my theories are correct or just fake. Am I not pretty just because of my weight?

BOO!

Today my question to everyone is that what people have in mind when they create horror movies. It’s like planning a secret revenge for the whole world. I simply don’t understand the concept of people trying to entertain themselves by scaring the shit out of them. Ok, ok! I do that too. Yep too often but today I thought about it and was amazed when I found out how stupid I am and to make me feel better let me rephrase this sentence that how stupid we are. Mostly such movies are watched according to me at places where there is lack of excitement. Believe me; I’ve had all the things to prove it. Let me tell you an incident which took place sometime about the 7^th of November. I and my friends were up for a night stay at my bestie’s home where we were dying out of boredom. Suddenly sleeping seemed like a much better option than staying awake. As if boredom had encompassed the whole room. I was not at all in the favour of sleeping as we had two beds and I was supposed to share it with the long haired friend. If you get what I am trying to say than check your mouth again, maybe there are strands of hair inside it ;) . Moving back to the point all of a sudden we got a brilliant idea of watching The Conjuring after which I suppose we all will be conjured. At first the whole room lit lamps of hope and delight as if they’d be able to pass the next few hours before sleep very calmly but it all went down into the drain mainly because my friend’s ipad was in her mom’s room and the other because at the thought of the movie and given the summary of it by another friend my cutest friend (who often visits the bathroom) got terrified and wasn’t able to go and pee! Well, the same happened with me and this made me realise what a pussy cat I was. Shame on me. I just got scared by the summary of a scary movie. That whole night before sleeping the entire visualisation of the film ran of continuous replay in my head and in the dark of the night I felt that I should kill myself but eventually I dozed off.

I shouldn’t be saying this but I love watching such movies although I just equally hate the scary part at night when everything seems related to the spooky scenes of the film in every way. So, when I watched The Conjuring at my home I observed my recent reactions which showed anxiousness and excitement. Probably why everyone watches such movies for. It’s all for the aderelaine.

Sometimes horror movies can make you want to pick up an ouja board and invite ghosts to your house and sometimes it can make you cover yourself with 10 blankets at night but my favourite one are the movies which make you laugh at the way horror scenes are directed. For example:

A long time back I was watching a scary show on the TV with my father. He is the only in our family of three who is courageous enough to watch it alone by himself so, that time I decided to accompany him. I had huge hopes and dreams of the way that would be directed and I waited and waited halfway through and all I got was smoke and night scenes. Nothing else. To be honest I for the first time slept peacefully for once after watching any such thing but it seemed more like a comedy show though.   

What my observation till now is that every horror movie has a ghost which seeks revenge. Well it’s obvious that’s why they are earthbound. The spirits never talk directly and sought out the matter. No, never it’s against their pride. All they do is break things and scare people to make them feel that they are here. Why can’t just they leave a note? All the spookiest things happen to be only at night. That’s why the actors get dark circles. That’s a fixed time as per the law of the ghosts. Maybe they are twelve hours before us, right? No wonder they are nocturnal. The actor will always look and go in the direction the weird thing happened and if I’d be there at that moment I’d be like nope,nope,nope! Why don’t they just run away? That’d be pretty much easier than getting killed or arrested by a ghost. The actor is meant to go in the wrong direction. ALWAYS!! Why are they so brave? I can’t even sleep by myself! The ghost bewitches the main lead or any other person. They move into a manor house with a family of three and I am here walking out of the house for some privacy. Even though they know that something’s not right the members decide to continue sleeping in separate rooms and are completely fine by being alone in the house. Someone comes and senses the attention seeking ghost. Finally someone noticed them! And this person is none other than a ghost buster. Bad luck for you spirits. The ghost buster performs exorcism and other sorts of nonsense things and voila! The ghost is gone!

Thank you for reading! Comment your spooky incidents below!

blast from the past!

hello everyone! today i am going to give you a blast from the past. mostly, we all remember our days of the past which we have still caged inside our memory and laught about them till years to come. so, today i will post a poem which i had written many years ago. hope you too get the message. comment about things which you like about you childhood and also your sweetest memories ^_^.

Things change limit to sky

 There is an end to everything

Things change within a blink,

Someday smiling, someday sad

Someone is cute but someone mad.

There is a limit to sky,

Who made it and why?

Why is not ‘four’ two plus three,

Maths is a bit hard for me.

Things may change but not me.